You Are 26 Years Old

26 Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe. 13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world. 20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences. 30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more! 40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

What Age Do You Act?

Your Taste in Music:

90's Alternative: Highest Influence

90's R&B: Highest Influence

Alternative Rock: Highest Influence

90's Pop: High Influence

Punk: High Influence

90's Hip Hop: Medium Influence

90's Rock: Medium Influence

Adult Alternative: Medium Influence

Classic Rock: Medium Influence

Hair Bands: Medium Influence

Heavy Metal: Medium Influence

R&B: Medium Influence

Ska: Medium Influence

80's Alternative: Low Influence

80's R&B: Low Influence

80's Rock: Low Influence

Country: Low Influence

Hip Hop: Low Influence

Progressive Rock: Low Influence

How's Your Taste in Music?

American Cities That Best Fit You:

55% Atlanta

55% Boston

55% Philadelphia

55% Washington, DC

50% Chicago

Which American Cities Best Fit You?

So, this semester. I have met and gotten to know so many amazing people. I am truly grateful for all the quality time and conversations I've had. So if you're one of those people, thanks for helping to make this semester bearable. I had plenty of great memories also, Julie's wedding, Utah with Rob and friends, meeting a whole new group of friends, getting to know other aquaintances better. I know I can be super bitch all the time when I get stressed out, and even when I'm not, so I thank you for putting up with me. Only one year left of college, then it's time for me to move into the real world, or maybe just stay for more school. Any ideas of cool places to move to?

I just wish one of these years I could truly find myself. Not have to hide certain sides from people, and just be completely open with everyone. Although that isn't likely no matter where I end up, it certainly is an eventual goal. Not that I even do it so much as I used to.

I'm sick of searching....living in my head....why can't the path ever be the right one? time being wasted constantly to no end, what is it all for? where is it all going? do these friendships I make even matter....will they last. will they hold through the test of time, or to be cliche are we just 2 ships sailing by, and we just happened to stop for a moment to shout hello?

Any ideas anyone?

Vic questions Sheena about her beauty secrets:
Vic: "Your hair smells fantastic! What did you wash it with?"
Sheena: "Zam Zam berries. What else would a woman use?"

Your Linguistic Profile:

65% General American English

20% Upper Midwestern

15% Yankee

0% Dixie

0% Midwestern

What Kind of American English Do You Speak?

You Belong in London A little old fashioned, and a little modern. A little traditional, and a little bit punk rock. A unique woman like you needs a city that offers everything. No wonder you and London will get along so well. What City Do You Belong in? Take This Quiz :-) Find the Love of Your Life (and More Love Quizzes) at Your New Romance.

Your dating personality profile: Big-Hearted - You are a kind and caring person. Your warmth is inviting, and your heart is a wellspring of love. Liberal - Politics matters to you, and you aren't afraid to share your left-leaning views. You would never be caught voting for a conservative candidate. Sensual - You are not particularly shy when it comes to your sexuality. You know what you like and do not feel inhibited.

Your date match profile: Adventurous - You are looking for someone who is willing to try new things and experience life to its fullest. You need a companion who encourages you to take risks and do exciting things. Intellectual - You seek out intelligence. Idle chit-chat is not what you are after. You prefer your date who can stimulate your mind. Outgoing - Shy and timid people are not who you are after. You need someone with a vibrant personality to breathe life into a relationship.

Your Top Ten Traits 1. Big-Hearted 2. Liberal 3. Sensual 4. Wealthy/Ambitious 5. Adventurous 6. Practical 7. Intellectual 8. Romantic 9. Religious 10. Traditional

Your Top Ten Match Traits 1. Adventurous 2. Intellectual 3. Outgoing 4. Big-Hearted 5. Sensual 6. Practical 7. Wealthy/Ambitious 8. Athletic 9. Romantic 10. Religious

Take the Online Dating Personality Quiz at Dating Diversions

guinness are love
brought to you by the isLove Generator

You are glucose. People feed off of you. You are
sweet, caring, and a source of energy for
everyone around you. You can inspire others
with your creativity and depth, and you can
keep people alive when in times of famine.
People love you...or at least the way you
taste.


Which Biological Molecule Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Moving on??? Well, after a drunk voicemail to Adam the other night, I finally deleted his number from my phonebook. I'm slowly making myself go forward, 'boxing him up'!

Concerto competition tomorrow..don't want to do it, know I won't win, but doing it for John. I'll be glad to have that over with. Hmm...just remembered I have a paper due on Weds, (since I won't be here on Mon. to turn it in) so I need to start researching for that!

Saw Jerry this weekend! That was really nice. Thanks for visiting ;) Got rather drunk on Saturday after the TubaEuph concert which everyone said went really well. We had a pitcher race at the Union (Optimator!) and then Mark/Katie/Justin/Ben and myself went to Portabella for a bottle of wine after that.

Well, I'm up to 18 credits again next semester. But it should be fun, it's all fundies, and methods, conducting, jazz, ensembles, voice, and a WOMEN'S WEIGHT TRAINING class, hopefully it'll help me get in shape, as I've really been neglecting myself this semester.

More later!

GO BADGERS! Man, I love football right now!

Concert band and uband concerts today, fun stuff! Probably won't get to leave humanities, but that's life i suppose. I lost my nerve yesterday, we were doing a high ropes course, and you're supposed to climb up a pole and dive off, and I just started hyperventilating, i felt like i was choking, so I just climbed down, and then started crying, rather embarassing. I just have a fear of losing control....but everyone who knows me..knows that. I just hate having to trust people, I'm afraid of it so much.

ahh..to blog. That is something I haven't done in a long time...maybe it is for lack of time, but probably not.

Life has been....busy, crampacked, stressful, fun at times, lonely, but full of friends...lots of writing and reading, lots of working, and not enough sleeping, full of procrastination, but then getting stuff done early for once...it's been phonics, physics, conducting, and practicum...methods, and quintet, CCE, Uband, Concert band--where i go nuts. Lessons are ok, my tuba playing hasn't been all that swell....I've met some great friends, and feel like i've lost a few also. my best friend is getting married, i'm going to s.c. for spring break, d.c. in january, home for thanksgiving....i have to get my student teaching app. in, and think about whether or not I want to go grad school, I have to start thinking about apartments for next year...AAAHHH!!!! TOO much stuff...I'm going crazy with this 22 credit crap, why am I insane? Oh yeah..I want to take only 12 credits next fall....7 of which will hopefully be an intensive Finnish course. Maybe I'll move overseas after graduation, i suppose it's to early to think, but we all know how I am..I'm drinking starbucks for the first time all year, I woke up early this morning, and my roomie was already up studying. I do love having my own room though, and a kitchen, it rocks! My eyes are still messed up however, from having pink back in august...blah! Hmm...I turned 20 a week ago, not 21, I haven't had sex in over a month, and it's getting to me. But I'm the gal guys are friends with, so, I suppose I'll have to get used to it. Not that you really wanted to know that...Well I suppose, I've unloaded enough random thoughts, now I get to read about everything you wanted to know about phonics but were afraid to ask....sound exciting? it isn't.

getting better. Well...this summer has gotten worse, and better, every other day practically. Right now I'm on a good part. Recently I hooked up with a guy named Alex---the next day came the shit storm from Adam. But then we talked about...became friends, and now we're all cool again. And it's nice to have a snuggle buddy. Maybe it's a bad decision, but whatever. He's all banged up, got into a drunk bike accident, and wrecked his arm and his nose. But he's getting better. I leave here in...16 days!!! Hooray. Work has been nuts, people quitting/being fired, shit getting broke, getting ripped on by members and Donna....just lots of shit. And as the slogan on the tshirt says, if it weren't for the bonus, we'd all quit. But I need that 3000 come October. Kim is at the beach in the Carolina's till thursday, which is great, cause I was able to practice today, and it's so nice not to have a roommate who is always on her cell phone. Pretty soon--it's back to Madison and Lynn! and hopefully our apartment will be jammin'! I need to go out and take some pics (we're decorating in bw photos we take ourselves!) Let me know what's going on in your lives. I feel so out of the loop. It was great seeing you biz!

Miss everyone :)

hmm....so what am I doing? Well, I only tend to post when
I'm drunk or emotional, and I'm both right now. I don't know what
i'm doing...Adam and I are back together, he professed his still love
for me in the shower the other morning.....but now he wants to sleep
alone (he needs to stretch out) and I can't kiss him in
public............goddamnit why can't i stop loving him. After
all we've been through I wish I could just move on and forget about
him, though I suppose that's why I can't--because we've shared so much.
Today us girls decided to HO out...I look hot, but what did he have to
say... "you look stupid, why are you guys dressed like that" but
I suppose that's alot to do with his dislike of anything sexlike--he
doesn't mind doing it, but god forbid talking or thinking about
it. But I'll do it, be with him---when he wants, who cares
about me....because I do love him, and I can't stop myself...and even
though everyone is dowstairs partying their asses off, and we've not
even dented 1 of the 30 packs, I just want to change into my pj's and
fall asleep. while I can be drunk and hopefully not think of
him....I guess I'll just go on flirting with everyone else, maybe it'll
ruin my chances with him, but whatever, I think we've had our best
times, everything from here on out will just be settling. Why
can't I just say goodbye to the memories?

SO FUCKING DRUNK! Holy shit...I smell like so many different guys right now....hope i don't puke.

I think I've figured out my bad mood as of late. I'm lonely--I've never really had to sleep alone here before this summer. I feel jealous of Kim, since she gets calls from people here to do stuff, when I never did, and I've known these people for 2-3 years, what is it about me that pushes people away? And of course then I get invited along, but I feel like a third wheel---or i suppose, technically, a fourth wheel since it is Andre and Chris...but whatever, i suppose I'm not skinny and cute, and that's what the guys here like, and of course all the girls that live here except me are gorgeous and skinny---and I get asked "are you becky's sister" when the oNLY thing similar about our appearances is the fact that both of us are overweight. Goddamnit! I don't like living by adam, I don't ever know what to do, I need to know that he doesn't like me anymore, so I can go on living and not guessing. I need a guy just to help me get over my dependance on him, but i suppose that isn't a solution, I need to be independent, but I miss snuggling, and kissing, and having someone there all the time for massages, hugs, and love. and now i'm making myself cry. Why can't I just be happy? How come all the great guys I know and love have to be taken, or gay, or far away? Why can't I just find one who'll be there for me. I have a need to be domestic, as much as it riles feminists, I love cooking, and cleaning, and having stuff there. I get to see Kathryn on Tuesday which will be nice. I hope others roadtrip out, I really REALLY need you....I miss you all so much. I love you :) Call me! I need company!

FUCK AK! I hate my life so much....I really just want to leave Harbor Springs and never come back or think about it again, but i can't. So you know how AK slept in my room the first night---I thought it was maybe something meaningful, but NO he was fucking drunk, but I suppose that is how it is in harbor springs, he's always either drunk or stoned. and now i have to live fucking next door to him for 3 monthes. FUCK! what am i going to do, i've cried myself to sleep everynight so far, and I don't want to do it for the rest.
I really just want to go.

Last night in the UP until Christmas---it has been restful, but boring! I did make $200 cleaning for my great aunt though which is nice--pay off some bills. I read A TON! of books---over 20 at least--and only went out with friends maybe 4 times--pretty pitiful, oh well. So tomorrow it is on to Harbor Springs-we shall see what this summer holds for me. I hope my bro gets a good roomie, and that i get to room with kim. Later. I don't know when we'll be getting internet, so who knows when I'll write next.